Enough

This morning on my way to work, I was thinking (while sitting in that dang traffic on 75S between White Avenue and Eldorado Parkway) about various things.  One of the advantages of not filling your brain with too much knowledge is that your mind is free and open to let thoughts just roam around.  One of my first thoughts was: "How many days do I have to sit in this line of traffic before I remember to take the Wilmeth Exit and go down the service road until both lanes of the highway open up again?"  Seriously, how dense am I?  I told myself it's Monday morning and cut myself some slack, thankful that I had a travel mug full of coffee and let my mind wander.

For the last couple of weeks, I've been thinking about my life.  I have a wonderful husband and family who love me no matter what.  I live in a decent house, but it's nothing special.  I drive a 2008 Honda Civic, nice car, gets me where I'm going, but it's not my dream vehicle.  I have a good job, I really like it, but I don't like the long drive every day.  I have clothes and shoes and jewelry - Lord do I have the costume jewelry - I'm addicted to it.  I love big, fake rings and necklaces and earrings and bracelets, I can't help it.  My husband says he can always tell what I will like - if it's gaudy I'll absolutely love it.  He's right.  And I don't care.  It's who I am. 

Ungrateful.  That's also who I am.  When is enough, enough??  That question keeps popping up in my mind.

I want:

•   a newer, bigger home
•   a Ford F-150 SuperCab - yes, that's my dream vehicle
•   more clothes
•   more shoes
•   more purses
•   more big fake jewelry
•   a big savings account

I need:

• Absolutely nothing.

 It's true - there's not one material thing that I actually need.
 
One of my favorite worship songs is "Enough", by Chris Tomlin.  Here are the lyrics:

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You are my supply
My breath of life
And still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
worth living for
And still more awesome than I know

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You’re my sacrifice
Of greatest price
And still more awesome than I know
You’re the coming King
You are everything
And still more awesome than I know

More than all I want
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than all I can say
You are more than enough for me

Yes, I love this song.  But I'm a big fat hypocrite because I don't live this way everyday.  There are people in this world who would love to have what I have, they would be ever so grateful, and yet, I complain about not having what I want.  When my kids were growing up, they would come to me and say, "Mom, I need _________".  I tried to teach them the difference between a need and a want. 

All 3 of my kids learned that lesson.  How come I missed it?

I have a friend - more of an acquaintance, really - whose husband lost his job last week.  It was the kind of job that required him be away from his family alot, but they were thankful for his employment.  When that job ended, as jobs do for so many nowadays, all she could say was "We have peace", and she quoted Philippians 4:11:  " Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatever state I am, therewith to be content."

Conviction.  Yet again.  I have so much more than I deserve. 

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

He really is enough - everything else is just background noise.  God please help me to remember this, every day, from now on.